Asking Questions In Search Of Effective Leadership With Dr. Jennifer Nash

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Working in various organizations observing behavior, Dr. Jennifer Nash has always thought that Corporate America is in dire need of leadership transformation. Asking questions and challenging the status quo, she looked for more effective leadership approaches that make people feel valued and connected. In this episode, she joins Tony Martignetti to talk about how she took a different approach to leadership. She focused on the human side, which led to deeper business growth and better teamwork. Dr. Jennifer also explains why entrepreneurs must embrace self-leadership and get out a patterned routine to get different and varied results.


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Asking Questions In Search Of Effective Leadership With Dr. Jennifer Nash

It is my honor to introduce you to my guest in this episode, Dr. Jennifer Nash. Jennifer is a Leadership Expert and Consultant to Fortune 50 organizations such as Google, Ford, ExxonMobil, JPMorgan, IBM, and the list goes on. She is the Founder and CEO of Jennifer Nash Coaching & Consulting, helping successful leaders connect people and performance to deliver exceptional results.

She has years of experience serving in executive and leadership roles at Deloitte Consulting and Ford Motor Company and as an adjunct professor at the University of Michigan. She contributes to Harvard Business Review, has presented her research at Columbia University, and is a Harvard McLean Institute of Coaching fellow coach.

She is the author of the bestselling Be Human, Lead Human: How to Connect People and Performance. It’s an amazing book. She lives in Austin, Texas. When she's not doing her work or working on her business, she's probably lighting up a dance floor. I love that. It is truly an honor and a pleasure to welcome you to the show, Jennifer.

Tony, thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here. I'm looking forward to our conversation.

It's going to be so much fun. I love this idea of bringing people by the campfire and sharing stories. I know this will be an amazing conversation because you do so many amazing things and you've been making such a great impact in the world. What I want to know is the inside story. What brought you to this space? Are you ready to share your stories?

I am. I love the fact that your show is called The Virtual Campfire. Growing up, I love being outdoors and camping. I have a lot of happy memories of sitting around the campfire and sharing stories. It's a natural way to bring people together, share that community, and help the memories live on through others. I love that.

We are kindred souls in that regard. As we're getting started, we're going to have you share your stories through what's called flashpoints. These are points in your journey that have ignited your gifts into the world. You can start with wherever you'd like to start and share whatever you're called to share. With that, I'm going to turn over to you to start sharing some flashpoints.

From a very early age, I was always someone who was more comfortable in some ways being in the background and observing. It's always been in my nature to watch other people, see what they're doing, and try to understand why their behavior is that way. It came to a head when I entered the workforce. I had a background in music, dance, and foreign languages. I got thrown into the business world and could not make sense of why people were behaving the way they were.

I would get an assignment and there wouldn't be any context around it. It would be like, “Here, go do this.” For me to work at my best, I needed to understand this little puzzle piece that you're giving me. How does that fit into the puzzle border? Where is it in the picture? What is the desired outcome of this? How is it going to move work forward? That would help me understand the why for why I was being asked to do something.

I asked a lot of questions. Sometimes, that's not always welcomed in a corporate environment because it tends to disrupt the status quo. I started to learn that some of the things that I didn't understand were things that I shouldn't be asking about. That didn't sit well with me. I spent a lot of time in organizations observing behavior, observing leaders, and learning what I thought was effective leadership and what I felt in my heart was not effective based on the reaction it produced in me and its effect on others. I wanted to understand why some leaders were more effective than others.

I started pursuing an MBA at the University of Michigan. That was one of my flashpoints. That experience with my amazing cohort of colleagues there changed my life and trajectory. It changed my path and what I thought about organizations because, for the first time, I found that there was this discipline or area of study called Management and Organizations. It dealt with the study of people and organizations. I'm like, “This is what I’ve been looking for. This is so cool.” They graduated me before I could take all the courses there. I was not happy about that. I ran out of credits. I decided I wanted to keep learning.

During that time, I had been working at Ford Motor Company. I was in a position where the company was not doing so well. They were losing quite a bit of money. We'd had a new leader come in. The leader that we had as an interim person decided, “I don't think I can turn around this company. I'm not the right person to affect this transformation. Let me bring in someone else.” They brought in someone named Alan Mulally.

Alan was an engineer who was very versed in the airplane world but they brought him into the car world in Detroit. At first, that didn't go over very well because he was viewed as an outsider. What Alan did was he came around and observed. He listened, talked with people, and got his finger directly on the pulse of what was going on. I thought that was amazing.

We were in this meeting and Alan said, “We took out a little home equity loan to improve the house.” He had essentially mortgaged everything that the company owned to get us enough money to do R&D to keep us going so that the company didn't have to take a loan from the government during that time or a buyout. I thought, “What he did takes a lot of courage.” I thought he needed to be recognized for that. This was another flashpoint for me.

I decided to recognize him. I tell this story at the very beginning of the book. I create this award for him and send it off to him, not expecting to ever see it again. I end up getting called into my leader of the leader's offices, where there were a couple of people sitting there. On the table is this envelope that I knew instantly had the award that I had sent to Alan in it. They told me, “We can't get this to him.” I said, “What do you mean? It was in an interoffice envelope.” It was marked confidential and all tied up with that little infinity symbol. They opened it on me. I was not happy.

I jumped in my car, drove over to World Headquarters, ran up the stairs, dropped it off with his admin, and asked her to please give it to him, and she did. A couple of weeks later, I had this voicemail on my phone from Alan saying how much that award meant to him and that he had a tear in his eye. It was so meaningful that I had taken the time to do that for him. I was blown away.

Here is this leader who is running this company, trying to transform it so it doesn't die. It's an American icon. Yet he takes the time to handwrite me a letter and send it to me with a whole bunch of swag that I got a couple of weeks after the phone call. Tony, I had been working in Corporate America for about sixteen years at that point. It was the first time that a leader had made me feel like I was seen as the human being that I was. It was such a powerful moment. It was a huge catalyst for me.

I was in the middle of my MBA program at that time. It inspired me to dig deeper and go further into understanding what made these leaders like Alan so great. Other leaders, who maybe weren't on that same operating level, how could they elevate their skills to have that same impact and effect on the people around them and on business results? I pursued my PhD and that was another flashpoint.

At the end of the day, I did a whole bunch of research during that PhD program. That research forms the basis for what I have in the book you are holding. It's the human framework, leading yourself first roadmap, the human leader action plan, and all of these things combined that help leaders who want to take their skills to the next level and lead in this new world of work in a new standard for leadership excellence. I call that human leadership and that's a longer version than I normally tell about my journey and flashpoints.

I'm so honored. First of all, the story is so beautiful. I'm going to slow you down a little bit and get into it because there are so many things about you shared, which are so meaningful. The first starting point is you sharing this idea of asking questions and understanding that people see the puzzle. Whenever you do a puzzle, you're always thinking that you need to know the edges and what it looks like because it's so hard to try, be dropped in the middle, and say, “Start putting it together.”

“I need to know more. I need to know the context and why we are doing this. Where is this going? Who's driving this? Who's behind all this?” It's important to think about that as a real puzzle we're trying to piece together by knowing the pieces and asking questions. That takes a lot of bravery and courage to do that, especially in the early days when you're just getting started. I want to focus on that for a moment because it's interesting.

My mom said that I started asking questions when I was three and I haven't stopped. It's no surprise that I'm a coaching consultant and an advisor. I help organizations solve their most wicked challenges. It was second nature to me. In some cultures, it's considered rude to ask questions because it is viewed as your questioning authority. You are undermining the person or they're losing face because you're asking them a question. I understand that.

In the US culture, in business in particular, there is a stigma around not knowing. The perceived power in organizations is that you always have the answers. I would argue that the power is in asking the right questions at the right time with the right people. I spent a lot of my career wondering, “Why am I being asked to do this? Why does it matter? How does it align with the business strategy? What does it mean for me in my career? Does it help me move forward? Does it hold me back? What is the value of me doing this work for the thirteenth iteration of this PowerPoint deck? Please help me understand.”

VCP 217 | Effective Leadership

What I learned through a lot of that questioning experience and being the courageous one in the room to put my hand up is to say, “I don't quite understand why we're doing this. Can someone help me understand that?” It's a very uncomfortable position to be in the room but I also knew that so many other people were thinking the same thing.

They didn't have the courage or vulnerability to ask the question because the power was in having the answers and knowing. It was not okay to say that you didn't know, especially as a manager or a leader of people. What often happened was those managers or leaders of people had not asked that question of the people who gave them the task. They didn't know. They didn't have an answer to give me. Often, it would be shut down with, “That’s the direction we're going. This is what you need to do. This is the way we do things here. This is how it's always been done.”

I start the book out. I’ve never been one for the road most traveled. This was the same thing for me. Just because it's always been done that way doesn't mean we have to do it that way going forward. What if there's a better way? Why are we doing it that way? Who decided that was the best way? Me fitting into the corporate world was always a struggle, especially given where I came from with my creative background, languages, dance, music, and things.

Just because something is always done in a certain way doesn’t mean it has to be done that way going forward. Look for better ways to do it.

I didn't think the same way as I saw people thinking in the corporate world. It was always a challenge for me. When I finally left professional services after ten years and struck out on my own as an entrepreneur, that ability to question, ask, and dig down into the root of things to help clients get to solving these challenges that they're having became an asset for me. Whereas before in my career, it was not necessarily viewed as that.

There are so many directions I want to go in because I do want to get back into the connection to Alan and his leadership. Before I do, there's something that you've hinted at this moment around this sense of, at first, you want to fit in because you move into these environments where it's like, “How do I make sure that I belong in this environment?” You realize in some ways that you don't necessarily belong just by fitting in. You belong by being yourself. I want you to share some of that, how that resonates with you but also go a little further into that. Maybe click into some stories around that.

I don't usually share this story either but I will share it with you. My family moved a lot when I was young. My dad would get a different job and we moved to a different town. At that time, I was a ballet student so I was preparing for a ballet recital that I had coming up. We had moved into this new school district. I was new in the classroom. I didn't know anyone. I didn't have any friends.

At that time, the elementary schools had the bathrooms that were inside the room of the classroom. I don’t know if you remember that. I had gone to use the restroom. How my brain worked and how I focused on things I love to do is I was rehearsing mentally, the ballet recital, in my head. At the same time, I was singing the song that went to the music for the ballet so I would remember the steps. I was visualizing it.

When I came out of the bathroom, everyone in that classroom was laughing at me, including the teacher. I'm young. I'm probably 7 or 8 years old at this time. I didn't understand why they were all laughing at me because this was my world. I'm preparing my recital, practicing, and doing what I need to do so I'm ready to go and I’ll look good on stage. They were all laughing at me. Do you know the Dr. Seuss quote, “You weren't born to fit in when you're meant to stand out?” That's been the refrain for my whole life.

I felt like that in the business world a lot. I had come out of the bathroom and people were laughing but I didn't quite know why. It was because I chose to do things in a different way. I chose to take that path less traveled and ask questions that other people may not have asked or didn't want to ask. I chose a different path that wasn't a traditional path throughout my career. I did what I call a lot of internships along the way and I learned a lot of things from a lot of different places.

I was trying to find where I felt like I could be my whole self and bring my whole self to work. I got the messaging very early on that wasn't safe to do that because I was different. I thought, acted, spoke, and behaved differently. Those things were challenging to the system that I was working in. As you know, when there's an outlier and a system, the system ejects the outlier.

VCP 217 | Effective Leadership

Bring it in line or move them out.

That whole top-down control command thing never worked for me. I would not have been a good military person at all. As I went through my career, it became very clear to me that the way for me to contribute the most value and show up as who I am with all of the talents that I am and have would be to go out on my own. At the end of the day, I couldn't find a place to bring my entire self to work and not hide part of who I was or what I was doing because those were things I loved.

At the end of the day, they made me a stronger practitioner but for organizations who couldn't seem to allow that part of it in, it wasn't helping me. It was a lot of emotional labor on my part to try to get up and do this every day. I got to the point where I was having migraines and sick every day. I learned I have to do this in my way. It’s like the Frank Sinatra song, My Way.

I can so resonate with what you're sharing. I feel like you're hitting me right in the heart because I can feel that sense of trying to fit in and feeling like you need to be yourself. When you do, you realize how much you've been holding yourself back from fully expressing yourself and feeling fulfilled because fulfillment comes from this place of bringing it all out.

The thing that was always so important to me and I always felt was overlooked was the people. I didn't care about EBITDA. I didn't care about the widgets, making them faster, better, or cheaper. It’s important but for me, it was about the people because, without the people, you don't have a business. You don't have anybody to create that performance. There is no way to get profitability. I was always more interested in people.

Without the people, you don't have a business. You don't have anybody to create performance or achieve profitability.

When I found that Management and Organizations, the field of study at the Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan, it changed my world because I'm like, “Somebody does pay attention to this.” Here's the way that I feel like I can best finally contribute in this space. That led me to study human behavior, culture, organizational dynamics, system dynamics, and all these different things that help us figure out how we work together as humans. How do we connect with each other, ourselves, and our work?

This is why the book is Be Human because we need to be human first. There's a sense that sometimes we leave the fact that business is all about the widgets, profit, and bottom line. You can't get there until you start with the first part, which is being a human. I want to connect back to Alan's story and how much of an impact that had on you in the sense of you have this person who's coming in from the outside, an engineer who you wouldn't expect would have a different way of looking at things.

Engineers usually fall in line and are like, “How can we work our way through this and think technically through this problem?” No. He came in with this real human approach and thought about it from, “I believe that we can change this.” That's what lit you up. That was a big flashpoint moment for you for the sake of seeing that one person with a belief in a change can move a company around. I don't want to over-amp it because you were on the inside but at least that's the sense that I got.

At the time, I didn't know Alan. I was a people leader way far down the ladder. He didn't know who I was. The voicemail was the first flashpoint. I'm like, “I can't believe you left me a message. That's a unique differentiator. I haven't seen that before.” The second was getting that package of swag with that handwritten letter in the interoffice mail. When I opened that letter, I saw that he had not only handwritten me a letter.

First of all, who does that? He had drawn a heart around my name. I saw that heart and I started crying. Here's this person who sees me as more than just an employee who is going to deliver output for this company and help add to the bottom line. Here's a person who sees me as a whole human being and what I'm bringing to the table, not just the totality of my output for this organization. It was the first time that I felt seen as a human being at work.

That's what we all want. We all want those moments of little things. Little gestures like that would make a big difference. They have to be backed up with real meaning behind them. They can't just be some empty thing. They have to be done with real intention. That's the word that I like to use on this. It has to be intentional. It'd be one thing if his assistant did all that but you have the sense that it was not him. It was him doing it.

It could have been a letter that his assistant had typed and he had signed but it wasn't. It was handwritten by him with a heart. For this leader of one of the biggest companies in the world at the time, who's been around for 100 years and an engineer to boot, for him to have that type of authenticity and leadership style and help each person that he came in contact with feel seen, heard, and understood, that was such a catalyst for me. It gave me hope and inspiration that there was a better way because up until that point, I had not seen effective leadership in that way.

When you take a look at the results that Alan drove for the company through, people first love him up, as he puts it. He took the stock price from $0.99, maybe $1, or something like that to over $13 by the end of his time. It was a 1,837% increase in the stock price during his tenure there. It's crazy. That's what happens when people feel like they matter. People feel connected to each other, their work, the organization, and the culture. They feel like what they do has a purpose and is aligned with the company. Also, they are understood.

VCP 217 | Effective Leadership

It reminds me often that there's a different type of ROI that we need to measure. Return On Inspiration. That's what he did. He inspired people to get results, not just because of the fact that it's like, “How can we maximize profits,” and things like that but about engaging people in this process of, “I believe in all the things we're doing and I care.” That became a way to engage people more.

We're going to shift gears a little bit and get back into the story. Tell me what happens next along the journey. When you got into working for yourself, what were the first things that you started to do? Were you immediately drawn into the world of consulting? Tell me what happened next on your journey.

I have spent about sixteen years in the automotive industry. Before I finished my MBA, I got recruited away from there to go work at Deloitte. I was at Deloitte for about ten years and then I decided it was time for me to elevate myself, improve my capabilities and skills, and do that in a way that worked for me and the clients that I wanted to serve.

I chose to leave Deloitte and become an entrepreneur. That was a tough decision. I'd worked my whole life to get that job. It was a great job with great benefits, a pension, and everything. I could have done that for the rest of my life and been set but it didn't fulfill me. I loved the clients that I worked with and I loved the work that I did but I didn't love how I had to do it. I needed to find a way that worked better for me so I left.

One of the first things I did to embrace like, “I'm on my own. You're going to get the whole me,” was instead of putting the purple underneath my hair where that was okay because I had to have this image of the proper corporate consultant person at Deloitte, I'm like, “No. Purple is coming out on top.” That's one of the first things I did and it made me so happy because, finally, I can be me. If people don't like it, they don't have to work with me and I'm pretty fine with that.

That was one of the first things I did. Since then, I did some more research. I do up the business. I’ve grown the business. I published the book. I'm in the process of putting together all of the workshops that go along with the book, all of the speaking topics, and things like that. I’m preparing to do a TEDx. I have some other things going on that are coming up that are pretty big.

It's interesting how this all starts building from there. You made it sound a little easier than it is. There's this journey that is like a rollercoaster ride, “Am I doing this?” It's something that I can see lights you up and makes you come alive. I want to talk about the book because people need to learn a little more. What is the book all about? What are some things that you want people to hear? They're going to better pick it up but I want them to know some of the concepts in it that you want them to know before picking it up.

The first thing I would love people to know about the book is that it has a leadership aspect to it but it is for anybody who wants to live and be their best human self. It's not limited to if you have a P&L or you're a leader of people. It's for anyone who is looking to figure out, “How do I want to intentionally design my life, leadership, and career so that I can reach my full potential and be fulfilled?” That's what the book is about and that's what I would like people to know, first and foremost.

The book is set up in a way that you can read it by individual chapter, picking one at random. It's set up where you can read it from cover to cover if you want to read it that way. The unique thing about my book is that it has a roadmap for you. It's not just, “Here are some great concepts that we're going to talk about and think about,” and then leave you hanging to figure out how to implement those.

I give you a step-by-step like, “Here's what you want to do. Here's a worksheet you can download from my website. There are multiple resources like that on the website available that are complimentary. If you want to be intentional about designing your career, leadership, and life, here's where you start.” What I have learned throughout my entire career is that if you want to be an effective leader, you have to lead yourself first.

If you want to be an effective leader, you have to lead yourself first.

You're preaching to the choir here. Self-leadership is the cornerstone of everything that we need to start there. People often overlook that or think, “I'm not a leader so there's nothing that I need to worry about here. What do I do?” We're all leaders because we have to lead ourselves first. There's a sense of starting there, having the awareness of how we show up, and all those things.

Oftentimes, people say, “Jennifer, I don't have people reporting to me. I don't have direct reports and a P&L. I don't have the title of leader or manager. Is this going to help me?” Yes. If what you're looking for is to evolve into your best self, this will help you. Sometimes, as leaders, we create a strategy for the organization. That’s what we do. We create a strategy and set a vision. I would invite people reading to think about how often you have taken the time to do that for yourself. Have you ever done it? Most people I talk to say, “No, I’ve never done it or even thought about it.”

It's funny. You reminded me of something that shows up a lot in our lives in general. It’s this sense of being a pattern breaker. We go through our lives and sometimes we get in stuck in these patterns. I feel like sometimes we need to disrupt and get out of those patterns like, “Why am I continuing to do the same things and getting the same results? Why am I doing these things that are not serving me?” We have to ask those questions to get out of patterns and get different results or get to a place where we will be more satisfied and fulfilled. The journey from self-leadership to learning more about ourselves starts by breaking patterns that may not serve us.

It's when we take the time to notice the pattern and then we decide we are going to break the pattern or we are not going to break the pattern. We have a choice. Many people will choose not to break the pattern because the status quo is easier and it’s comfortable. The unknown is scary and dangerous. We are wired to avoid the unknown. Our brains want to resolve things that are unknown, unfixed, or unfinished. That's how we're wired. To go against that takes a little bit of effort. It may be easy but it's not simple.

Choose your adventure in a moment here. I'm trying to figure out where we want to go next. Here's the question I have for you. What are some lessons you've learned about yourself that you haven't already shared that you want to share that you think will be valuable?

The first lesson I have learned is that as an entrepreneur, you cannot succeed on your own. It has to be a team or a group. I am so lucky to have some of the best people working and partnering with me to help this be possible. It's the same with publishing a book. When I wrote the book and I turned in the manuscript, in my mind, I thought, “I was done.” I check the box and move on but that was just getting you in the starting gate.

An entrepreneur cannot succeed alone. They have to work with a team.

I realized, “No. I have to market the book.” Tony, I am not a marketer. I don't know which end is up. I had a marketing class in MBA school but it wasn't my forte. Figuring out and getting on that learning curve of how I market when I'm not a person who likes to market myself at all has been a big challenge for me. One of the things that I have learned is that I have to get out of my way, be willing to talk about the book, be on stage, talk with people, and share that information because if I don't, no one else will.

That's been a hard lesson for me. Honestly, it's something that I struggle with every day. It's hard for me to get out there and do that because I don't want to come across as salesy or push something on someone they may not want or not be ready for. I don't do any marketing with my business. It's all word of mouth or VIP clientele. This is a new space for me. It's pretty uncomfortable, honestly.

It's so funny you bring this up because this is such a beautiful thing to share. It resonates with so many people because it is uncomfortable. We're much better at marketing other people's stuff. We could market out of everyone else's stuff but we can't do it so well for ourselves. It's this weird block between feeling like we've done something ma amazing and then it's time to yell from the top of the mountain and say, “Look what I did.” It's funny. I was interviewing a woman named Lisa Bragg who wrote a book called Bragging Rights. You're going to go pick up that book.

It’s all about bragging but it is beautiful. I resonate with what you shared. It was very nicely said. We're coming close to the end. I don't want to end but I want to ask one last question. It's related to books but unrelated to what we've been talking about. What are 1 or 2 books that have had an impact on you and why?

There are so many books and little time, is the first thing I will say about that. One of the books that had an impact on me from a personal standpoint was a book by Harold Kushner called When Bad Things Happen to Good People. I don’t know if you've ever read that book.

I’ve never read it but I’ve heard of it before. I'm intrigued. I'm going to go have to read that.

That book was impactful for me because I experienced an eye injury when I was studying abroad one time. It landed me in the hospital and I had surgeries. I had to come back and had more surgery. I didn't understand at that point in my life why something so bad had happened to me when I was a good person. It was challenging for me to question a lot of things that I had previously taken as truth.

It helped me evolve in that way to realize that some of the belief systems that I had grown up with weren't necessarily serving me in the way that I wanted them to serve me or needed them to serve me. It was okay to let those go, shift, and find something that was more suited to me and what I believed going forward. That was an impactful book for me.

I appreciate what you shared because there's a story but also some great insights that make me want to read that book even more. Thank you.

You're welcome.

Are there any other books that you wanted to mention? No pressure.

I will mention this one because it's one book that I refer to and recommend to my clients a lot. It's called What Got You Here Won't Get You There by our friend Dr. Marshall Goldsmith. It's so true because he reveals these truths that we all know but don't articulate. We see them but we don't recognize them. I allude to this in the book Be Human.VCP 217 | Effective Leadership

The way that we get to where we are in our careers, the skills that we use, and the abilities and talents that we've developed to get to that point are not always the ones that are going to help us go forward. What I often talk with my clients about is that you may be an amazing project manager or auditor. You're super skilled at finding that needle in the haystack but when you get to this level of being a global director, it's no longer about finding that needle in the haystack.

You have to develop a whole new skillset. Likely, your toolbox is empty of how to develop, grow, inspire people, and get them to connect with one another. It's so true that what got you here won't get you there. I experienced that as well when I shifted from the corporate world to being an entrepreneur. I had a mindset of, “I’ve got this corporate thing down pat. I'm good. This will be cake.” I get into being an entrepreneur and I quickly realize, “This is not cake.”

I have that experience every day in everything I do so yes.

For the record, I love Funfetti cake.

I want to respect your time and move us to a close but first of all, I have to say thank you so much for coming on the show. This was so much fun.

Thank you so much for having me. If people could see that we have little heart signs going at each other. This was great and I enjoyed our conversation. I hope that your readers take something away that's helpful for them in evolving their life, leadership, and career.

I'm sure they will. They better. I'm kidding. Before you go, I want to make sure that people know where they can find you. What's the best place to reach out if they want to learn more?

They can find me on my website, which is Everything is there like the contact information and information about the book if it's something they're interested in.

Thank you so much. Thanks to the readers for coming on the journey. I know you're leaving inspired and ready to be more human. What this is all about is us embracing our humanity but also doing it so that we can make an impact in the world and be fulfilled. Thank you so much.

Thank you, Tony.

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